COMPENDIUM OF A SCRIBBLER.

Aaj me jaun esa hoga nahi Aaj tum jao esa me hone Nahi dungi Tere intezaar me kitni raate yuhi guzar di hai  Aaj Beth ke baate hongi, jazbaat niklenge or hum alfazo se apne dil se nikle lafz byaan karenge. 

Ever heard about Recycling?  But not litters or any non living things,  Here I'm talking about Recycling a human being.  Practically it's not possible though but Emotionally it is. There are people who deliberately get recycled.  And for a better understanding I would clear the meaning of recycle, here it basically means; a human being used by another human being over and over again.  But a recycled human's weakning power only affects their emotional state.  No matter how hard they try to stay strong, the other person's presence and influence push these recycled versions to not stay strong and honour the other person's demand. Using them like puppets, these people are so proficient in controlling with their attitude and planning that it's not only difficult to deny what they have to say but impossible to even say anything in return.  It's like stepping on gum, the more it sticks with you the longer it stays with you.  S...

When I was in college, all the songs I listened to were my favourites. Now I'm home and the new songs don't tempt me anymore.  I know just why, because every song had a story; few I listened to with my friends, in some new cafe in the town and others were just a collaboration of all my friends playlist which they used to play either in our frequently happening house parties or our random trip plans anywhere the road would take us to. May it be a little longer drive or huge short trips, those playlists were a must. I couldn't help but wonder, how the time had passed so quickly?  Like I went to bed for a nap and when I woke up, All was gone! I Don't even feel like I should make an effort to have a liking for new songs because I'm so much consumed by my classics. All of the memories I made with my buddies were those songs which I am not giving up so soon. I am a very committed person and when it comes to like or try new things, Dude I'm sorry I can't...

I'm trying to get away with this feeling. It's this particular time where I'm feeling the weakest, otherwise nobody was as strong as I. I know how to take care of myself when things are not falling into place. This is a natural and the most obvious phenomenon and to face it with acceptance is the right thing to do. First of all no one is above you, so stop feeling pathetic about your life. Secondly, some one told me that if you can't be the reason for your own happiness, then how can you expect from others to keep you happy? To that, my opinion is just listen to that someone and accept the reality that it's practically impossible. In the real world, we all look for someone who can make us feel special and better.  To an extent where you yourself can be the only reason for that kind of feeling. But in the end you need to accept the bitter truth that happiness comes from inside only, when there is someone from outside who can do that one special thing ...

It's not one of those nights of Insomnia where all you want to do is pen down about yourself in and out. It's those nights when you purposely taking your time off to figure out the cold hearted and soft hearted side of yours. Not leaving a single feeling that is running on your head. Every pinch of your heartbeat making rhythm beats according to the way you feel. How the hell did I go into such a deeper thought? But trust me, I have many! They automatically gets activated into my system. At 2'o clock, When you're thinking about your deepest sorrows but not regaining anymore and your head is empty, all you get to hear is the sound of the clock and few dog barks. Suddenly my concentration is not on my true feelings, but in and around! Then I ask myself a question; will I ever come out of this chaos? By that I meant the war that's between me and my inner self. I received no answer because I had no idea what is going on in my life, Only one thing I know is th...

मुझे याद है हमारी वो पहली मुलाक़ात , जब करी थी हमने आँखो में आँखे डॉल कर बात । मार्च के महीना था वो जब देखी पहली बार तुम्हारी शक्ल प्यारी , छह माह तक बात करने के बाद भी मिलने पर बातें वही थी हमारी । मैंने पूरी त्य्यारी के साथ अपने आप को सजाया था , ताकि तुम्हें अच्छी लगूँ इसलिए हर तरकीब को अपनाया था । मिलने के समय साँसे मेरी रही थी थम , डर रही थी बेचेनी ओर घबराहट भी नहीं थी कम । सोच रही थी दिखने में मेरा दोस्त होगा केसा , एकदम अलग या जो तस्वीर देखी है वेसा । जब वह घड़ी आयी मेरे अंदर भी बड़ गयी थी बेताबी , तुम्हें वहाँ देख के दिल को जेसे मिल गयी थी खिताबी । तुम वही बहार खड़े मेरा इंटेज़ार कर रहे थे , जब मुझे देखा तो मंद मंद ही मुस्कुरा रहे थे । मेरे नज़दीक आके मुझे गले से लगा लिया , मानो इतने वक़्त का प्यार जेसे उस पल भर की नज़दीकी ने जाता दिया । इक सुकून सा मिला तुम्हें गले लगा कर , मुस्कुराई थोड़ा फिर से बेचेनी चढ गयी सर पर । बेथ के अपनी शुरुआत केसे हुई उस पर की थोड़ी सी बात , ओर हमारी कभी ना ख़त्म होने वाली बाटों से कट जाने वाली थी पूरी रात । ग़म तो सिर्फ़ घर वापि...

Sometimes I think why I didn't write anything for myself , Anything that specifically was meant for me. Let me go back to the time when I used to live in my own world and the soul of mine was free. Hidden thoughts about others worry me now a days, This was not a person I used to be. More alive, a lot more fearless, To define my personality now a picture is all I get to see. Hard to digest, harder to believe, I have made myself a big fat tree. Lost and immortal with too many ugly branches, Ready to get drown into a sinful, an unholy Sea. But I certainly see an audacious Sailor, Swaying towards me, gazing straight into my eyes, he knelt down on one of his knee. "May I have the pleasure to take you for an adventurous sea ride"?  he asked, "Why not"! I said as quickly as I could, There we were enroute paradise at the count of One Two and Three.